Today

Yesterday, I wept for our friends and their baby in distress.  The fear was big and the tears came often because the most likely outcome was grim at best, and the very worst outcome was certainly possible.  I burned 3 grilled cheese sandwiches in a row because I couldn't concentrate on anything but this dear baby and his mother.  I prayed and pleaded and imagined each word joining a chorus of prayer from dozens, if not hundreds of others who knew of and loved this family.

Today.  Today the Lord replied.  He moved a mountain for the mother.  And He healed.  The grim and worst for the baby are no longer, and he is growing stronger.  All who prayed and pleaded changed the chorus to "Hallelujah!" In the resurrection the Lord conquered death. Today I feel like I saw the Lord conquer death for a little boy just starting his life on Earth.

She's Good....and by that I mean diabolical.

How does a little sister get her justice-loving, rule following, people-pleasing big brother's goat?  She draws a picture of him scaring her, tears streaming down her sad little face and then hangs it on the fridge.  When big brother objected to the subject matter of the picture she quickly drew JESUS in the sky, looking down on him with contempt.  And then drew ropes around him because, "I tied him up for being mean."

Not sure what the floating heads are (cherubim?) or whom the fellow on the right may be.  I'm just happy she drew Jesus as judge and not our Elf on the Shelf.  This proves that our family holiday traditions are not confusing her theology.

Answered Prayers

We have to walk through Nathan's bedroom to get to ours.  On the mornings Steve rides his bike to work he sneaks through Nathan's bedroom around 4:45 am.  This morning Nathan woke up.  Sometimes he goes back to sleep, but not this morning...at least not until 6 and by that time I was wide awake.  So, after a very difficult morning-after-halloween battle to get the big kids ready, and a bout of ongoing (and growing) uneasiness about Daniel's school I stood over my kitchen sink and got a little teary during my plea to God to get us the heck out of this house! Several unknowns and obstacles stand in the way of this. The least of which is the fish that I keep hoping will die before we get the house ready to show because we need to move the tank and there is no place else to put it.

The fish died this afternoon.  Amen.

Daniel's Prayer

This is for Daniel's memory, because his mom can't remember dates or details of conversations...

Last night, after books, Daniel asked me if Jesus ever sinned.  This led to a discussion about Jesus dying on the cross and how God left Him alone for just a moment so Jesus could take on all of our sins and die in our place.  And by some precious words and timing from the Spirit, Daniel wanted to pray for God to live in his heart.  We called Daddy to tell him the good news.  I put Daniel to bed.  And then I crumbled and wept in gratitude.  Thank you, Lord for calling my son.  I am overwhelmed.

Homecoming

Since more and more soldiers are coming home these days, there are tons of videos on tv and online of soldiers surprising their families with their homecoming.  I tear up...every...time.  Especially when the kids just fall apart into sobs and whimpers because they missed their Daddies & Mommies so.  Every time I see one of these videos it makes me imagine what my homecoming will be like.  I've studied a little Daniel and Revelations and I know He's coming back in all kids of loud, crazy (frightening) glory.  But at some point, I guess at my judgment, I imagine I'll get to be alone with Christ.  Maybe while I'm waiting outside the courtroom.  I bet He'll be late just to make me sweat.  But I wonder what I'll do.  Will I fall on the floor and weep in shame and humility?  Will I run to Him as soon as I recognize Him and jump into His arms?  Will I ask for ID?

I really, really hope it's not an awkward hand shake.

Princess Jealousy Rears Her Ugly Pink Head

This is Addie's Princess Celestia My Little Pony.  I HATE her.  When you push the button on the tramp stamp on her butt she says phrases like: "I'm a Princess! Are you a Princess, too?"  "Look at my BEAUTIFUL wings!"  "My hair is SO PRETTY..." among other stupid things.  And she says them all in this really snarky voice that definitely implies that she is better than you.

Sometimes Addie will use the incorrect word or name for things and the other day she pulled out her precious Princess Celestia and said, "You play with Apple Jack and I'm going to be Princess Jealousy."  I laughed.  I could NOT think of a better name for her.

This week the kids have been at VBS at Greentree and a few of us moms got into a discussion via blog posts about feelings of inadequacy, judgement, comparison and compliments.  I fell on the inadequacy and judgement side of things, as is my nature, and was convicted.  Not a single woman at Greentree has ever talked to me like Princess Jealousy about her shiny new SUV or perfectly smocked children, but because my head decided to compare, I made myself feel inadequate being there.  In fact, I've gotten to know several moms at Greentree and they are all kind, and full of love and heartache and grace and failure....just like the women who go to my church where I feel most at home.  Lord, when will my default not be a 12 year-old-girl?  When will I really believe I am created in your image and redeemed?  And when will I believe that about other people, too...including my children?

I'm going to take the batteries out of Princess Jealousy now.