Daniel and I are going through a rough patch. A lot of arguments over silly little things (No, you can't have cotton candy because you just ate a cookie) and a few arguments over bigger things (You may not hit your sister.) And on the worst days it has spiraled into shouting matches between us. The arguments usually begin when I start to dole out the consequences for disobedience and disrespect. Before I know it, he's screaming at me and we're leaving the playground just 15 minutes after we arrived...much to Addie's dismay. I wish I could get through to him. I've tried different consequences, disengaging from our conversation, and even a few desperate attempts to drown him out with loud music. This is when I'm supposed to have some wise revelation about how God disciplines and leads us as our Father, right? The last couple of times we argued, Daniel yelled at me, "MOM, I AM JUST GROWING UP!" So he gets it. Learning to be kind, healthy, wise, safe, patient, etc. is hard. I hear you, kid. Teaching those things while lacking mastery of any of them is even harder.
Do you even know how much your open and honest writing just touched me!? THANK YOU! I am going through a difficult spot with Molly too... nice to know I am not alone! She falls apart so easily an goes into sobbing fits... and I tend to fall apart too- not in tears but in frustration! I know this too will pass... but OH how I long to be more in control of my own reactions and behavior! Thank you... today I feel like I am not going crazy... we will get it one day, won't we Jen!? XO
ReplyDeleteLove this picture of Daniel, love this post.
ReplyDeleteWhile I cringe to think about how difficult things are at present for you and Daniel (and that I am in for the same misery in the future), I admire you, Jen, for not only sharing your feelings, but for admitting that you know it's OK to have them. You are a thousand percent better than millions of parents who resort to extreme, abusive measures to discipline a child for misbehavior. Maybe that is the subtle way in which God is leading you now: he is keeping you grounded enough in your love for Daniel to keep you from even considering losing that control.
ReplyDeleteI am hugging you from afar!!!